I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
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Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He? As in you personified your dick?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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