Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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