All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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