How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize