I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize