We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize