What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize