On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize