Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize