I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize