Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize