In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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