So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i just google imaged poop.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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