I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never drinking with the goths again.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize