Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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