She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
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the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
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I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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