you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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