he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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