You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think weed is turning my hair brown
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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