took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
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