So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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