i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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