HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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