hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Fuck appropriateness.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize