dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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