well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
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