Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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