Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
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