I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize