The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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