phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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