waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
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