Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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