Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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