david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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