I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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