Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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