You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize