So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize