It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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