Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize