Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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