My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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