So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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