you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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