I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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