If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize