Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize