whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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