all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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